‘I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you should have lost at least 5 pounds.
When the Irishman returned, he shocked the doctor by having lost nearly 60lbs!
‘Why, that’s amazing!’ the doctor said, ‘Did you follow my instructions?’
The Irishman nodded…’I'll tell you though, by jaesuz, I t’aut I were going to drop dead on dat 3rd day.’
An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn.
When he finished all three, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender says to him, ‘You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it;
It would taste better if you bought one at a time.’
The Irishman replies, ‘Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, the other in Australia, and I’m here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we’d drink this way to remember the days we all drank together.’
The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.
The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar and always drinks the same way: he orders three pints and drinks the three pints by taking drinks from each of them in turn.
One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars’ in the bar notice and fall silent.
When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, ‘I don’t want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss.’
The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then the light dawns in his eye and he laughs.
‘Oh, no,’ he says, ‘Everyone is fine. It’s me……I’ve give up the drink for lent!’
I don’t know how many of you are aware of the new N3 motorway being constructed in County Meath ? The motorway is going straight through a historic region close to the Hill of Tara. While I know that if you are commuting to and from Dublin every day it must be no fun sitting in traffic and that you want to spend time with your family not sitting in tailbacks but surely the government should have planned the route so much better. I believe they have let the country down very badly and we will live to regret this route. Protesters have dug underground tunnels and are prepared to live in them so as to stop any more building of the route.
Ireland’s poet laureate and Nobel Prize winner Seamus Heaney has branded the plan to build a freeway through the Hill of Tara as “ruthless desecration”. Professor Heaney added that, under British rule in Ireland, Tara appears to have enjoyed more protection than in today’s Irish Republic.
What are they doing about it - NOTHING. They each blame the other department saying they are responsible , I am not into politics as I believe they are all corrupt (look at all the tribunals going on, Bertie being the biggest liar of them all ) and they haven’t listened to European and World organisations appealing for the area to be saved. What can we do ?
March is the month when Irish governments send out diplomats to all corners of the world in honour of St Patrick’s Day. This year, a large number of representatives from Meath, Trim and Navan councils, surrounding the Hill of Tara, will travel abroad to promote flagging tourism, and, no doubt, to ease tensions caused by the international outcry over their continuing illegal desecration of Irish heritage at Tara (the chairman and manager of Meath council will be in Sydney and Melbourne).
This is a call to Irish people to go out of their way to greet these diplomats with the cry “Save Tara!”. Let the words “Save Tara!” resound.
Now I don’t call myself an activist but I honestly don’t know what ordinary people can do - this is at least an attempt.
The Saint Patrick Day celebrations begin today in Ireland and continue until Monday the 17th when the celebrations are closed by a fantastic Firework display. For a full list of events in Ireland then go to the official Saint Patrick’s Festival Website
Title: Erecting Carrick-a-Rede
Description:Photo of the erection of Carrick-a-Rede rope bridge
Copyright: Reproduced with kind permission of National Trust
‘If you think it’s frightening crossing the bridge itself, you should see the process involved in putting the bridge up in the first place…’
A new bridge for a new season – the famous Carrick-a-Rede Rope Bridge, which is recognised as one of Northern Ireland’s most breath-taking attractions, was recently erected by the National Trust.
There is an eighty feet drop to the sea from the bridge itself, it’s construction once consisted of a single rope hand rail and widely spaced slats which the fishermen would traverse across with salmon caught off the island. Nowdays though it has been replaced with a rail on each side although people still get very nervous crossing it.
If you would like to see what it looks like then follow this link and take a 360 degree view, remember to look down as this way it’s safe ! Carrick a rede Rope bridge Virtual tour
NEW YORK (AP) — It’s depressing, it’s not usually sung in Ireland for St. Patrick’s Day, and its lyrics were written by an Englishman who never set foot on Irish soil.
Owner Shaun Clancy stands behind the bar at Foley’s Pub and Restaurant in New York on Wednesday.
Those are only some of the reasons why a Manhattan pub owner is banning the song “Danny Boy” for the entire month of March.
“It’s overplayed, it’s been ranked among the 25 most depressing songs of all time and it’s more appropriate for a funeral than for a St. Patrick’s Day celebration,” said Shaun Clancy, who owns Foley’s Pub and Restaurant, across the street from the Empire State Building.
I know that we are in the middle of lent and all, and folk shouldn’t be tempted but I couldn’t resist posting this little ditty I received from a friend in Canada :).
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An Irish woman of advanced age visited her physician to seek his help in reviving her husband’s libido.
‘What about trying Viagra? Asks the doctor.
‘Not a chance,’ she said. ‘He won’t even take an aspirin.’
‘Not a problem,’ replied the doctor. ‘Give him an Irish Soluble Viagra. Drop it into his coffee. He won’t even taste it. Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things went.’
It wasn’t a week later that she called the doctor, who directly inquired as to progress. The poor dear exclaimed, ‘Oh, faith, bejaysus and begorrah! ‘Twas horrid. Just terrible doctor!.’
‘Really? What happened?’ asked the doctor?’
‘Well, I did as you advised and slipped it in his coffee and the effect was almost immediate. He jumped his self straight up, with a twinkle in his eye, and with his pants a-bulgin’ fiercely!
With one swoop of his arm, he sent the cups and tablecloth flyin’, ripped me clothes to tatters and took me then and there, making wild, mad, passionate love to me on the table-top! It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute feckin’ nightmare!’
‘Why so terrible?’ asked the doctor, ‘Do you mean the sex your husband provided wasn’t good’?
‘Oh, no, no, no, doctor, the sex was fine indeed! ‘Twas the best sex I’ve had in 50 years of marriage!
But sure as I’m sittin’ here, I’ll never be able to show me face in Starbucks again.’
The emerald isle is not so green when it comes to protecting the environment , so says The Lonely Planet Guide to Ireland. The streets may be scattered with litter and I agree it is not a pretty sight but the Irish warmth and humour still make it a favourite place to visit. The guide quotes the European Environment Agency as rating Ireland’s carbon footprint per person at more than double the global average. You may have seen the increase in 4×4 Jeeps etc which are not driven by farmers who may need them but instead driven as a status symbol by many housewives.
The celtic tiger has led to on over exuberance of luxuries and but deep down we are still a welcoming nation. We still love the music and the craic and this will always be part of the Irish psyche.
So remember at first sight the country may have changed, some say for the better as there is no more emigration but deep down we are still Ireland of the Welcomes !
I would like to invite you to watch my video of Ireland while listening to the tenor voice of Michael Londra. You can check out his website here Michael Londra
The video was uploaded just over a year ago and has been viewed by around 350k viewers !
Let me know what you think of it.